When I first started training, as with everyone, I started off doing one night per week.
As I got more and more into it I was invited to join the school. This of course opened up an additional night of training to me. The only problem was that the additional night was a Friday.
At the time I considered my life to be quite busy. I played in a band, I studied Martial arts one evening per week and Friday night was “go out straight from work still wearing your tie and drink until the pub throws you out night” so I was forced to make a decision.
How do you want to spend your time?
At first it was not an easy decision to make. I was already pretty busy and going to the pub on a Friday was well established and definitely enjoyable. Aiki on the other hand was new and confusing but also enjoyable in a different way.
In the end I decided to squeeze Aiki into my seemingly busy life. It wasn't so hard really. Some things just had to move over a little to make way. Somehow it fitted in almost seamlessly.
At the end of the day you will make time for the things you want to do. You will rush around to free up a little time, you will reschedule prior engagements and even cancel things to allow you to fit in the things that you enjoy doing the most and get the most from.
It can also be quite amazing how much time you really have got and how much you can actually squeeze in if you try.
Time is, after all, relative. Some retired friends of mine cannot believe how they ever used to fit a full time job into their lives due to the fact that they now have all the time in the world yet are still busy as ever.
The phrase “We live by our means” is most often used in regards to money in that we always spend what we have and manage to get by on less than we ever thought possible but it can also be applied to time. We often feel that our lives are full to the brim with responsibilities and endless tasks yet we often acquire new ones and somehow manage to carry on without collapsing from exhaustion.
I've seen a fair few beginners come and go over the years that I've been with the school.
I am a firm believer in the power of positive feedback so when I actually get notification from beginners that they no longer wish to train I always ask them why?
It tends to be one of two reasons:
- I can't afford it
- I haven't got the time
What they actually want to say is:
- I do not want to spend my money on something that makes me sweat & think
- I would rather spend my time in the pub, playing video games or sitting down
It would seem that a lot of people feel it is better to give a feeble excuse than actually say what they think and that stating that they do not have enough time is actually a satisfactory response.
For beginners (or future beginners) the hardest thing to do is to start. To actually do more than just say to people “yeah I've always thought about doing <insert favourite martial art here>.“ To juggle things around so that they actually have Tuesday evenings free. To apologise to their girlfriend for not going out for that meal because they're going to grapple with some sweaty people. Not easy.
This does spread into everyday life as well. Starting things can be difficult. The Red Hot Chili Peppers had it right when they said “never been a better time, than right now”. I have found that this approach can work. If ever I’m asking myself “when shall I do that?” I hum along to the song and do like the evil sportswear company and “just do it.” Everything else tends to fall into place around it. Having done the hard part and put time aside to do it things tend to be easy to continue.
So how many times have you said it? “I haven't got time.”
I'll tell you how many times I've said it, a shed load. It's any easy thing to say really, “I haven't got time”. It's an easy way to get yourself out of doing something. An easy way of avoiding going to visit your parents or doing some menial yet essential chore. Another way of saying “no thank you. That's the very last thing that I'd like to do right now, I'd rather set myself on fire.”
Come to think of it, it's such a throwaway comment/lie that when I say it and actually mean it I feel the need to prefix it with “I genuinely....”
Where I work there is frequently overtime offered. If I wanted I could come in on a Saturday and a Sunday and even get time and a half for my trouble. My time on a Saturday is, however, worth more to me than time and a half so I don't bother coming in. It is the same choice again. “what do you want to do with your time?” only this time the people asking the question have tried to bribe me with cash. My priority list has way too much above going to work on a weekend to even entertain the idea. Admittedly I could do with the cash but we live by our means so I'll just live a little meaner.
It has often been said that time is money but I always thought it only applied to big time business men, the sort that do multi million pound deals over lunch, work 7 days per week and never see their children. On reflection I think it applies to us all. We regularly exchange our time for money with our employers. We “invest” time in things that are important to us like our families, not because we want to see some kind of return (although it would be nice sometimes) but because we think it is worthwhile. Time can also be frittered away just like money and should be spent wisely because it is most finite.
For all of us to regularly “spend” some of our time in the dojo training demonstrates our belief that Aiki is worthwhile. It also demonstrates our ability to choose what we want to do for ourselves and that sometimes we will choose the harder option for good reason.
Of course we get something out of it i.e. self development and maybe even enlightenment but remember we are all sharing our time with each other. Not to mention sweat and the occasional spot of blood! It is not a one way street though. As much as we get something out of it, our fellow Aiki practitioners also benefit from the enrgy we bring into the Dojo.
If money makes the world go round, time is money and spending time in the right place and money on the right thing gives you Aiki. Does that mean that Aiki makes the world go round? I think so.
